It's not fair!!

It's not fair!! Why?? Why???
Haha, I've been asking who knows those questions the past few weeks. I've asked God, and I think He's pretty sick of me asking so many "Why"s. He probably answered me so many times, it's just that I was too stubborn, or too deaf, to listen.

I know I should think maturely, should handle this whole thing like an adult. I'm not a child after all, and crying over spilt milk won't bring it back. (hee, just gotta look for other cows now :p)
But it's not fair, why do I have to go through this?? and ALONE??!? I've put in so much effort, so much of myself into it, gave so much patience, so much care, so much love into it all. Why am I getting this in return?? WHY???? I HATE THIS. I HATE YOU.

Somehow, I can imagine God telling me, "there people around you who are suffering worse torments than you, how is that fair to them?? Some of them are even born with their sufferings, and yet, here you are sitting and whining about this trivial challenge I gave you, obliviously blind to their plights!"

My dad told me too, part of the healing process is to help others in their sufferings, share in their burdens, and help them heal as well. In that way, we actually realise how fortune we've been all along, instead of just focusing on the bad things that's happening to us.
Hmm, haven't really been helping, listening, or supporting anyone lately. Maybe I should start.

I know I have to face this challenge, and pull myself through it. It's just so tough, so much easier said than done. I laughed, when Mingwei said yesterday, "Yes, it's easier said than done. But still, it must be said, then done."

Tough, tough. I'm told I will come out of this stronger than before. But I dunno if I'll even come out of it alive.