Where are you?

You were supposed to arrive this morning, something I was looking forward to this past 4 months, even meticulously counting down the days as they trudged on. We started at 119, and were so excited when it became double digits.

We had so many plans, touring the Great Ocean Road, watching the sunset with the Eight Apostles, shopping at Melbourne Factory outlets, maybe even flying to Gold Coast for a week of fun! Looking forward to this holiday was what motivated me, even when I was burdened with problems, exhausted from life, thinking of you just kept me going.

We never got past 70.

MEQ Paper

Malcom's the patient with anemia,
from chronic colon cancer.
Michael's the one with myocardial ischemia,
presenting in a breathless manner.
Sarah's sister had viremia,
from her MMR vaccine.
That's why her mother
doesn't want her immunising.
One poor old lady had RA,
and had joint pains the whole day.
She ought to take DMARDs, I'd say,
or get her joints aspirated today!
Someone had a lump in her breast,
and had to go for a mammogram test.
She better get it excised, lest
it grows into a malignant mass!

That more or less sums up my MEQ paper for today. Made alot of careless mistakes, although I thought it went pretty ok, for the amount I actually studied before this. Hopefully next week's papers won't be that difficult as well.
Good luck, everyone :)

Exam Week!

Exams have officially begun, with an exciting RLE paper today that left me with PBLogenic dyspnea. Breathless. Trying to understand and answer the question while forcing thoughts of impending doom down that tiny little drain in my brain was an extremely tiresome thing to do. Of all diseases, today's case had to be about spinal cord injury resulting from trauma, with our patient having loss of sensation and paralysis/weakness in her lower body. Kinda sounds like the state I'll be in when I actually get the results back.

Here's a nice song I like... it's called Nella Fantasia (In my fantasy)

Nella fantasia io vedo un mondo giusto,
Li tutti vivono in pace e in onestà.
Io sogno d'anime che sono sempre libere,
Come le nuvole che volano,
Pien' d'umanità in fondo all'anima.

Nella fantasia io vedo un mondo chiaro,
Li anche la notte è meno oscura.
Io sogno d'anime che sono sempre libere,
Come le nuvole che volano.

Nella fantasia esiste un vento caldo,
Che soffia sulle città, come amico.
Io sogno d'anime che sono sempre libere,
Come le nuvole che volano,
Pien' d'umanità in fondo all'anima.

In my fantasy
In my fantasy I see a just world,
Where everyone lives in peace and honesty.
I dream of a place to live that is always free,
Like a cloud that floats,
Full of humanity in the depths of the soul.

In my fantasy I see a bright world
Where each night there is less darkness.
I dream of spirits that are always free,
Like the cloud that floats.

In my fantasy exists a warm wind,
That breathes into the city, like a friend.
I dream of souls that are always free,
Like the cloud that floats,
Full of humanity in the depths of the soul.

Nice song with nice lyrics :)

Will be updating less regularly, with the exams on and stuff. Anyway currently don't have any plans for the hols except maybe a short trip to Melbourne to meet up with some friends I haven't seen for quite awhile. So if anyone has any ideas on places to go, stuff to see, things to do, please tell me or ask me along!
Otherwise, I'll just be waiting to go to Victor Harbour with Danielle in her new car! hee.
Good luck to all Uni-Adelaideans for their exams! (but don't take too much, I need alot of luck too heh)

~~~

Sometimes, I just wish and pray that things didn't turn out like that. I would pray so, so hard, fighting back those tears my heart cries out every night. So many whys, with so many answers that I don't want to listen to. If I had the power, I would love only you, wait the 100 years before the Prince awoke Sleeping Beauty with his kiss, be the Angel in your fairytale, happily ever after.

But wanting you to love me back would be too selfish of me. After all, you said it was tying you down, and you wanted to fly. The grass is always greener on the otherside, you always say. Well, I truly hope you find it, your greener grass.

~~~

My revision-deficient week

Today is Friday, the last weekday of a week devoid of study! I've been trying to focus, but that state of pure concentration keeps eluding my grasp, despite all efforts to attain it. During every attempt to absorb textbook knowledge, my mind inevitably wanders to my life these past few weeks, and there I am, powerless to control the unstable entity, losing all authority over my thoughts. What a mess!

Anyway, crap aside, I went Pullman's buffet at Skycity again yesterday afternoon, and had a great lunch there, eating succulent lamb chops and beef steak (actually both were pretty tough), crispy batter fish fillets, delicious spring rolls, and of course, who would forget the delectable desserts, like rich luscious chocolate cake, banana-caramel pie, mouth-watering chocolate mousse and many more. We celebrated Lam's birthday as well, which was so sneakily hidden from us this past year. Happy Birthday Lam! Yum yum. hahahaha. Great food, great morale boosting time, considering exams are just in two weeks! EEKS.

Watched an amazing World Cup opening in Germany, with all the excitment in the atmosphere. There were wonderfully performances, dances, and a parade of the past World Cup winners! Fantastic!

***

Tomorrow, I'll be starting afresh. No more wasting time in front of MSN, pining, longing, waiting, watching. It's -stupid-, and it has been wasting so much of my precious time the past few weeks. No more hanging on to old memories, wondering, hoping, praying. So stupid!!
Yay, I can't wait till tomorrow! Hopefully, the coming weeks will be as good as I'm hoping it'll be.

Leny's Birthday

Leny's birthday was last week! We - her housemates and our church friends, ate at the $5 unlimited pancake place (whee!!), and gobbled down massive amounts of pancakes. I think it caused a worldwide catastrophic shortage of pancakes, causing the prices of pancakes to soar in stock markets all around the world. Amazing

On Friday, we went to BBQ City near Chinatown to have a sumptuous chinese meal, and even bought her a cake with a candle and all! (A small cake though :p )
Happy Birthday Leny!

My weekend!

Spent my weekend making mango pudding and baking hazelnut squares (which turn out to be more of soft-hazelnut-cookies. Maybe it's cos I overdosed the chocolate). It's for my PBL group on monday, last PBL group of the semester. Will really miss seeing Kudnarto so often though, unless of course she's in my group next sem! Haha, time to do abit of infiltrating into the MEU!

Went to church to play on Sat evening, and was surprised to see Leny there, cos she told me she wasn't going. Went to this church near my house on Sunday, and am going to play there next Sunday! But catch is, I've gotta bring my piano there, cos they have no organ. haha, am excited.

Eugene and Hans and I were invited over to Aya's place to eat dinner! Thanks alot Aya! She made Rojak, and fried chicken. Amazingly friendly of her. We also got to meet her housemate, Evelyn.

Oh on Saturday afternoon, we saw huge beautiful rainbows! There was a double rainbow actually, but it is pretty hard to notice in the photos! I'm still looking for that pot of gold!!

The end of the world

Why does the sun go on shining?
Why does the sea rush to shore?
Don't they know it's the end of the world,
`cause you don't love me anymore?

Why do the birds go on singing?
Why do the stars glow above?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
It ended when I lost your love.

I wake up in the morning and I wonder why ev'rything's the same as it was.
I can't understand, no I can't understand, how life goes on the way it does!

Why does my heart go on beating?
Why do these eyes of mine cry?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
It ended when you said good-bye.

Patient case study report: June 06

The patient is a 21 year old male who is presenting with symptoms of severe emotional distress, recurrent heart pains and acute confusion and depression. He complains of regular shortness of breath upon rest, retrosternal chest pain, general fatigue, lack of emotional well-being, and lack of motivation. The current episode started two weeks ago.

Symptoms began two months ago, and was most severe at the start. Attacks occur frequently, mainly at night, but in the day time as well. There was an incubation period lasting two weeks prior to that, when minor symptoms were observed.
He has been on detachment and distraction therapy two weeks after the onset of the illness, but they have not been working effectively.

His past history is unremarkable. He had a similar but much less severe episode about a year ago.
His family history is unremarkable.
His social history is consistent; he has not been doing anything out of ordinary routine that might have precipitated the symptoms. He is currently a student who does not smoke and drinks only occassionally. However, his social life has been severely impacted by the illness.
Systems review has revealed that he has been sending daily emails beginning two weeks ago, which coincides with the onset of the most recent episode. Patient claims that he was only trying to keep to a commitment he made.

A physical examination of emotional and mental state has revealed the following:

Examination report:

Pain, loss, longing, jealousy, possessiveness,
selfishness, anger, frustration, depression, sadness, confusion present.

This illness seems to be self-limiting, but recovery times vary from person to person. In certain cases, it might develop into a chronic condition that has major impacts on the person's social life and emotional and mental well-being.

Patient is advised to continue on distraction therapy. He will be prescribed 5mg support-from-friends, to be taken 3 times a day, 2mg be-positive pills 3 times a day, and advised to concentrate on his studies, which will complement the distraction therapy. (He is also recommended to play his piano more often, because music sooths the soul.)

A follow-up has been scheduled in three and a half weeks time.

Peter O'connel Day!

Today, we had the chance to meet our Peter O'connel [not his real name =) ], a tetraplegic/quadraplegic (paralysed in body and legs, and lost some functions in his hands) who suffered a spinal cord injury during a car accident nearly 19 years ago. During the lecture, we were given insight into the difficulties a quadraplegic faces in his daily life, which we all so often take for granted.

To get out of bed, he has to roll to the bedside, grip the handles of his wheelchair carefully, and whilst maintaining his balance, pull himself over to the chair. It takes them about 6 to 9 months just to master how to pull themselves into and out of their wheelchairs when they need to transfer themselves into a car or onto a bed. Clearing his bowels takes him a few hours in the morning (he commonly wakes up at 4am to prepare for his day), and emptying his bladder involves regular self-catheterization throughout the day. At the start of his rehabilitation 19 years ago, he needed help in almost all daily activities, be it cleaning, moving or eating, and took many months to learn to do them independently. He also needed to install modifications into his house (especially bathroom). Luckily, his parents were highly supportive of him, both emotionally and financially. (He had a paralysed friend whose mother disowned because of his disability!! So mean!!)

Sometimes, this just makes us feel much more blessed with what we have, and make us realise that we actually take so many things for granted. Just waking up, washing up and eating breakfast is a real feat for a disabled person, whereas it's just another daily routine for us.

Sometimes, we get so caught up in comparing ourselves to others, feeling so jealous and unhappy that we're not leading the happening, cool lives that they lead, watching them party every other weekend! We don't notice that there are miracles occuring around us, even when we perform routine tasks like waking up and walking to the toilet.

Ask the quadraplegic how it feels to get to the bathroom every morning,
Ask the blind man when was the last time he saw the rainbow,
Ask the deaf man when was the last time he heard Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.

Sometimes, we are so greedy, we want to have everything. To us, the grass is so much greener on the other side, that we lose sight of the lush vegetation on our side of the meadow.

Sometimes, we long so much for that elusive grass, that we forget to water our own grass, and they wither and die, leaving our once beautiful meadow all lifeless and barren.

Sometimes we are so obsessed with our problems, that we fail to see how much the people around us are suffering. We just think life is so unfair to us, and wonder why bad things happen to us, when those bad things are just anthills, compared to the mountains of challenges life presents some other people with.

I truly admire Peter O'connel.